YESS this song is so good, i used to listen to it so much!! it's timeless and i still listen to it lol. it's nostalgic, i love listening while playing old games. also i love this drawing?? one of my best friends irl has eyes that are almost exactly this colour (hers have blue rims) and god they're stunning. lovely drawing!
coffee.berry wrote:i got my exam back - 94/100!
first of all, great job!!! that's flippin amazing!!!!!
coffee.berry wrote:we were discussing our grades because the professor is pretty laid-back, and i asked my friend S about hers.
i was just like "hey S?" and then her side partner, R (they're best friends) said "yeah?" as if he
was her secretary and now, hours later, it hits me
he's freaking in love with her. he braids her long, brown hair in class and always sits next to
her and like.. she's lucky. he may not be the cutest in looks but like - that's a WINNER. in
stereotypes, he's the class clown mixed with a jock which isn't usually the best person but he
makes up for it.
firstly i have to say it's funny that he responded to you saying her name lol instead of letting her respond. but that's probably just instinct idk. i love how you called him her secretary xD but really. that's beautiful. having a BOY braid her hair is so intimate my god. that's so sweet, it really is. i'm happy for her! it sounds like he's a nice dude.
coffee.berry wrote:i don't know if anyone has a crush on me lol i have a faint idea that a guy in my class, P, does
since he tries to talk to me/refers to me a lot but nobody braids my hair in class or makes an
effort to sit next to me. the only person who's ever asked someone to swap seats so they'd be
next to me was my ex-crush and current best friend who used to like me but says he doesn't
anymore. good times.
i totally think that S and R are outliers. having somebody braid your hair in class sounds so sweet and loving. it sounds like something out of a book, really. but i think that everyone has different ways of expressing their love for others. some people are touchier, some just look at you adoringly when you aren't looking. but i do get that feeling of wanting to be crushed on. i really do, vai - it sucks. i SERIOUSLY understand it, it hurts. wanting to be appreciated by others for simply existing is such a hard feeling. wanting to be loved romantically is hard.
i want to say "you have friends that love you for who you are!!" because you do, but, ultimately, i don't think that'd help much haha. we're both in school so i can definitely offer you this advice as somebody who has never been in/accepted a romantic invitation:
• people are SO messy. even friendships are hard. boys our age don't typically act with good judgement and can destroy you if you happen to get into the wrong relationship. girls can too, i'm just saying this from the perspective of a cishet girl who has only ever had "experience" with boys.
• school (romantic) relationships don't often last and just lead to people disliking each other
• this probably doesn't help much but having to think of/depend on another person for emotional validation or even just. the maintenance of being in a relationship is tiring lol. people love drama and will always be watching you. instead of chatting with your friends at lunch, it'll always be "omg vaiiiii so how is it with [x]??~". you're no longer a singular unit - you're two people. at least in my experience.
again this probably isn't helping much because i totally get how you feel and this isn't helping me too much but. i figured i'd at least respond haha. it helps me work out my feelings too, if that helps? i'm here if you need anything ^^